GREAT MYSTERIES OF EUROVISION
Do you know? Were you there? Can you explain? As Moldova sang in 2011: ‘There is a my-ster-y…’. Although they were singing about something else. But this is Eurovision. You can sing about anything. As long as it’s love, not enough love, too much love, world peace or werewolves. Here are some of the great mysteries of Eurovision:
If we ‘say goodbye to yesterday’ and don’t want tomorrow because ‘tonight’s so good’, what happens to today?
AZERBAIJAN 2011 ELL and NIKKI
‘I’m running upstairs tonight….’
GERMANY 2012 ROMAN LOB
Speaking of which…try this at home, kids. Sing along with Ell and Nikki: ‘I’m running, I’m scared tonight/I’m running, I’m scared of life/I’m running, I’m scared of breathing…’ Now sing along with Roman: ‘I’m standing still/I’m standing still/as you leave me now…’ Notice anything?
8th? 8th? You’ve got to be kidding. Why didn’t they win?
Man in trench coat, 3 funky bad dudes and ancient ruins. Throw in some autumn leaves and you have – ?
How can they be so consistently fabulous and creative? Of course being fabulous and creative (and occasionally wacky) doesn’t guarantee a thing.
SEBALTER SWITZERLAND 2014
All about whistling. How does one whistle with confidence in front of 200 million people?
RAMBO AMADEUS 2012
What’s he got against snowpeas? It’s there in verse 2:
‘I don’t like snow peas. Nat-i-on-al-ism. Poo-ri-tan-ism…’
Come on, Rambo, embrace your veggies. Or at least eat them.
THE OLSEN BROTHERS 2000
BELARUS 2009 PETR ELFIMOV
How could this demi-god not make it through to the final? Europe, what is wrong with you? What was wrong with you? Think back to Moscow, 12 May 2009…what happened that night??
NORWAY 2002 HALDOR LÆGREID
A power ballad and what a voice. That high note. The length. The vocal control. Why did he score so unimpressively? Guess it’s not cheery enough. Let them laugh, Haldor. You were outstanding.
Where did you go? I want you back. You absolutely nail classic pop.
Who creates the backdrops for Iceland? From Yohanna through to Pollapönk? Eyþór Ingi’s Ég á líf was heartwrenchingly beautiful. Creative genius. Works of art. Thank you. Takk.
THE END FOR NOW
but more to come…